Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Texts from my sister

The title really explains it all.

"When I was loading my car, Sadie [our beagle] jumped in and laid down so I left the door open and when I came back PEPPER [our smelly dog] was in there too! Stiiiiiiinky!"
"Pepper knew what she was doing."
"Oh my god, the Asian man in the silver singlet is at the Y again."
"There is a sign on the bus for a church that ordained the first openly gay pastor and it says 'we know a homo sapiens when we see one.'"
"Your brother likes your new friendship. RAAAAR."
In response to Pepper carrying around a massive dead shrew: "Ooooh Pepper must be doing a little outdoor theatre-taming of the shrew! Wocka wocka wocka!" 
"Sick, help [Pepper]. Stick your finger down her throat."
"I'm looking at volunteer jobs on craigslist and a bunch are for disease studies. One says, 'Do you have gout?' It's so frustrating! I've only found like three that are legit!"
In reply to Pepper nearly biting off my foot: "Hahaha it probably smelled rancid.  Her favorite flavor. She's probably going through the change."
"[Our aunt] started rubbing the elvis magnet against her cheek."
"Grandaddy is drawing mustaches and beards on every single woman he can find in the paper. 'I love to mess up pictures. I hope you never smoke. I'll give her a cigar.'"
"TC was telling him to do something and he said, 'your hair needs combing' and started giggling."
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