Thursday, January 22, 2009

One Clown Right After the Other

Great. George W. Bush left office taking creepy Dick Cheney with him, and now we've got another clown in the executive branch: Joe Biden.  Who can forget the classic idiotic quotes from Ol' Joe like, "You can't got into the 7-11 without an Indian accent. I'm not joking," or upon introducing his wife, he made some off the cuff remark about her having an advanced degree...and that he didn't want the audience to discredit her because of that.  And what about requesting Missouri state senator Chuck Graham to "Stand up, Chuck, let 'em see ya!" when senator Graham is wheel-chair bound?

Former President Bush had plenty of these moments, but at least when he screwed up, he knew that he screwed up. And you knew that he knew.  Mostly because his eyebrows arched a little bit higher, his eyes darted back and forth, and you could imagine him thinking "One third of America just saw that on live television. Crap."  Joe Biden's face remains stoney which is either a pretty good deadpan, or he's being absolutely serious when he's being absolutely idiotic.  Based on the way Obama discretely grabbed Biden's elbow, I'd have to say it was the latter: "Now, now, Joe. We've talked about this. Too many words, too much excitement."
"Sorry, Barack. Say, I still don't understand why you chose the more qualified Hillary Clinton over me."
"We all have our reasons."

At the start of the new year, Pat Robertson predicts with deadly inaccuracy what's going to happen in the year.  I praise the Lord everyday that I'm no Pat Robertson, but here's my prediction with Joe Biden and Obama:

Biden takes a trip to China to reestablish goodwill and open economic talks between the USA and China.  Upon seeing a senior party member over 5'6" he loudly exclaims, "Wow! You must be considered tall around here!"  Obama sees it on the morning news and races outside for a cigarette.

Biden prepares a speech for UN delegates meeting to draw up peace treaties for the Middle East.  Obama makes the secret service take an alternate route so that Biden arrives late and can only give 15 minutes of his hour long speech.

Biden goes to France and meets with President Sarkozy.  He leaves his microphone on and goes to the bathroom.  He spies a bidet and says, "What in the heck is that? Wait, I'll call Barack and see if he knows.  Hello, Barack? Joe here. No, I'm not having any trouble with the names again, I'm wondering what this thing is here in the bathroom. Probably a bidet? Ok. Yeah, see you later. PEACE OUT!"  CNN captures the whole thing, along with President Sarkozy stifling a laugh.

Right now I'm hoping that Obama will quit smoking and stay healthy enough for the next 4 years to continually remain stony faced throughout Biden's screwups.

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